An idea of what it is like to attack such a large project

This whole process of reading, looking at what is useful, writing, attempting to figure out what will be useful to people - it is all both a 'challenge' and a satisfaction at the same time, though sometimes alternating. 

At times, I "see" that I will not be able to achieve my "ultimate goal" of:

"Dramatically improving the happiness and lives of over 1,000,000 people, such that they in turn dramatically influence for the better the lives of those whom they care about and those whom they are just around."

At other times, I think "well, if I can just make a difference for just a few people that is plenty good enough.  I can be happy about that."   Sometimes, I just think "well, this is enjoyable, exercising my mind, figuring out things, writing" and that can be enough.  Sometimes I think that this is a good process just for my benefit, though I am not certain that I am not giving up something else I could do in life that would serve me better.  But, then, I ask, what could be better than this endeavor, or what several workships call an "impossible promise".  (I'm still not convinced that it is impossible, though I do wonder if I do have the "right stuff" and the "space" to create what is needed.) 

Will I be able (or, more appropriately, choose) to put together such an organization as The Life Management Institute or University, whatever I would call it? 

At times, it looks impossible, like I would have to be a much stronger, more motivated individual or like it would be too much effort and too great a sacrifice for me. 

But, would it? 

I could do it, if I so choose, as I know I am capable of doing virtually anything anybody else could do if I gather enough knowledge and/or support, just as Tony Robbins purports for all of us - we can, indeed, do virtually anything else somebody else can do. Or if I chose to use experts and other resources to leverage off of.

When I tell someone about the site, few even look at it and I receive virtually no comments.  There are virtually no visitors, as there are millions of sites that come up first in the search engines.  So I might be like the noise of a falling tree in the forest when there is no one to hear it.  It could be useless.  It could, indeed, be a Keith's Folly.   Perhaps, there is too much I am trying to gather together, inserting pieces as I get interested in them, but no cogent useful whole, unless people determine their own paths.

Even Barbara, who I work with extensively, seems not to do much of her homework.  At times I wonder if there is too much for people to do, if they have enough time, if they would be willing, if it is practical and usable, if it will provide a benefit to someone.  My belief at this point is that I need to make some things very, very simple and very easily doable, though I see many things like that in books and I gather that most books go without the "exercises" being used.  That is something I need to address in my planning.  Will it take too much time?  Is it doable?

I am amused, mostly, when someone brands me with a "who does he think he is to think that he could change the world and be wise enough to do that!?"  Or "he must be arrogant, believing his own story and thinking that he is one of the wisest people in the world."    I know it is "their story" and that it is not true about me, so it has little impact, though it could, on their side, get in the way of having a relationship with that person. 

I can get caught up, at times, in the "maybe this might actually happen" story.  "Maybe I'll put out the most practical, usable writings and they'll sell so well that it'll fund The Life Management Institute."  It does get my juices flowing at times.  And I also could appear on tv and help inspire millions of people from the interviews (yes, even Jay Leno's show)...
Perhaps I can put together such a great proposal and make the practicality and the benefits so clear that I will finally be moved to make a phone call and say "Hey, Bill, how about 10 mil?"  And Bill Gates will see the benefit to the character of millions of people and the value in turning around this nation from its slippage. 

And, perhaps not.  Perhaps it is a bit of an addiction, as I am drawn to it and away from doing "practical" things that I should do.

But, I think it will be fun.  And interesting.  I am curious to find out how it turns out, in each moment of the "turning out".  I know, at times, that I might feel discouraged and that I am spending far too much time without getting enough results - and that I might have to have an affirming talk to myself to remind myself of my true thinking and my higher perspective on the matter (looking at what I inserted into my Reminders Notebook).

We'll see!  Meanwhile, I think I'll just enjoy the ride!
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