THE ONE BELIEF TO CHANGE
THE ONE THAT ALL ELSE IS DEPENDENT UPON
I don't mean here to insult you. If you put aside your indignation for a moment, you might learn a highly, highly valuable piece of wisdom that will change your life significantly for the better. Be convinced of this, so that you will effect the changes listed at the end of this piece! Please!
THE CRUCIAL MISSING PIECE
YOU ARE WHERE YOU
NOW WANT TO GO
WHAT'S MISSING? (DUH!))
Well, there are a few things missing actually, but there is one without which you cannot or will not achieve what you want. It's one, as evidenced by behavior, which we all have to some extent (except for the fully enlightened 3 people in the world), but which many of us don't fully realize - either because we are not looking or because we are successful enough that this other part is obscured.
It's really quite simple.
It is the belief that you are still a child (at least to some extent, even if you're not seeing it!).
It's as if you allowed yourself to get stuck there.
"But", you protest, "I don't believe that. It's silly. I know that I am a grown up."
Maybe, in an intellectual sense, anyway.
THE SURE SIGN
But I can tell if you still believe you are a child by the sure sign of it - by your child behavior and your taking on and operating from that viewpoint - and by the results you're getting (or not getting) in life.
If you engage in anger behavior, you are striking out like a helpless child who thinks the world should conform to what he wants. So he uses, sometimes in a low consciousness manner, the tool of anger to attempt control in order to get what he wants. But he fails to see the result - failing to see the result is another child trait, of not yet having learned that the world doesn't revolve around him and not yet learning that control and manipulation don't work and not yet learning of the harm he is doing to others (and especially not aware of the physical effect of that stress on himself!).
I can tell if a person still believes he/she is a child by the results he/she produces. It's simple. If there is an effect, there must be a logical cause. And an enlightened, full responsibility adult would never engage in those behaviors. It is very, very clear.
Another sure sign: A child/blame/excuse/dependent point of view always results in a large number of unsolved problems in one's life.
A person who takes full responsibility for his life and all that happens in it is doing the opposite of the child (see the chart below).
[You've heard this before, from all the sports coaches, the life coaches, and the gurus. Most often people have become oblivious to it, perhaps not truly "getting" its value. Its value lies in it causing one to create a much, much greater life.]
Just believing one is a child and coming from that point of view (which couldn't be done if one is an adult) is the cause of blame, resentment, anger, rage, tantrums (!), comparison, feeling powerless, dependency and seeking rescue. Surely a reasonably enlightened adult would not engage in those. But if you do any of those, you are living from the viewpoint of a child.
The problem is that people who have grown up bodies are often living in the "Land Of Inbetween" - between being a child and not yet fully being an adult. The consequence is that we have become accustomed to that behavior and we attribute it to "being normal" and "just being human."
Well, bullbleep! Total bullbleep! Don't stand for that for a moment, at least not with yourself.
Why?" you say.
Because it is what gets in the way between you and getting all of what you want.
You cannot "close the gap" unless you take full responsibility for closing the gap, which means you will do whatever it takes to get what you truly want in life - without excuses - oh, did I mention that was a child ploy? (If I have an excuse, meaning something else to blame, then I don't have to be responsible, meaning "at fault" or blamed for it. It is another affirmation, in speech and in action, that "I am not responsible. The cause is 'out there'." The responsible person encounters the barrier and merely starts figuring out how to get around , or over the barrier - or how to eliminate it. He doesn't "fold his tent" early and go back to sucking his thumb and seeking pity or understanding from another.)
But, "it's too hard to do", the child protests, "as I am a victim without power and I fold at the first sign of a barrier." The responsible person assesses what needs to be done and then goes out and does it (if it a productive use of his time).
Other than occasional luck or despite themselves, some people who are not responsible succeed in something (and then they screw it up or screw up something else in life). Responsible adults succeed because they only spend their time and focus on getting the results they want and then they take the responsibility to make it happen - they act on it.
How else could someone succeed without doing what it takes to close the gap??? (A number of people don't "think this out", as they seem to have a vague impression that somehow success will come from something else... Duh!)
OK, you either get the idea, and choose responsibility for results, or you don't, in which case you'll just not succeed if you don't take it on.
I would recommend you stop doing all the things in the left column and only do the things in the right column. Some of these are the cause and some are the effect from which we can reasonably derive what the cause was.
In case I did not make myself clear you absolutely stop, cease, desist doing the child stuff and you absolutely insist on doing the responsible adult stuff - and by so doing you actually start to reprogram yourself and your brain into having more power - the power to get what you want in life. (Print this and keep it with you until you've got it right!
(Don't do these!) (Only do these!)
[And please realize that even if you are a "successful" or even if you are considered to be powerful, if you are doing any of the behaviors to move away from, it'll make a huge difference in your life itself be much more successful.]