THE ESSENTIALS FOR CREATING HAPPINESS
WITHOUT THESE YOU CAN'T BE LASTINGLY HAPPY
THE DEFINITION OF HAPPINESS
Recall the definition for happiness (notice unhappiness contains the opposites):
1. Feeling good about yourself. (I am a good person, I do what is right and beneficial in life and for other people, I am proud of myself...) 2. Having the confidence that you will handle life and be able to produce happiness no matter what. (I have the skills to handle life and I will make it turn out well for me.) (With the insights necessary, you can essentially be "Fearless")
THE ESSENTIAL EQUIPMENT
The key is using this equipment
1. to gain knowledge and
2. to develop the abilities that produce happiness (as specified below).
THREE WAYS TO GET "THERE" - MAKE YOUR CHOICE
(However, the program is much more productive and efficient than Buddhist practices!)
2. Hope you'll be happy, maybe learn, maybe have the right circumstances and people (usually results in "partial, conditional happiness" accompanied with lots of unhappiness) 3. You insert the essentials for guaranteed happiness. (Follow the Program.)
I vote for #3, as I don't have the time or inclination to be a Buddhist monk!
Skip any of these and you'll not be able to be truly, deeply happy. You know these, or most of them, but if you are not yet totally happy you have not placed enough importance on them to have you actually implement them! Complete whatever is necessary to achieve these, as soon as is possible! Checkmark which of these you will do or develop. Put an "M" next to the ones you have sufficiently mastered.
__ The ability to learn (assimilate, fill in the holes in understanding, acquire knowledge)
__ The ability to think (discern, reason, use logic; put together in such a way as to be an
effective problem solver and maker of good decisions - without this, you'll be burdened
with problems that need not have occurred at all)
__ Deciding what works and implementing it (Just notice what works and what doesn't and
__ Knowing how the body and mind work and then doing what works for them (if you don't,
you will be less well off or suffer)
__ Result: An absence of most of the "hits" you suffer in life.
__ Emotional intelligence (sufficient understanding of emotions such that you can see and
respond appropriately to them in yourself and in others)
__ Thought control and selection so virtually no negative thoughts persist.
__ Positive languaging, impeccability with your words.
__ Knowing that it is not circumstances or other people that you are dependent upon to
__ Completely take care of self-care
__ Confidence that you have all the basic equipment necessary and that there is a path to
__ Knowing that you are 100% responsible for yourself and not dependent.
__ Knowing what produces happiness and what doesn't
__ Gratitude (a perspective of "having")
__ A sense of safety, sufficient certainty
__ Absence of exaggerated, false fears; the absence of anxieties during the day
__ Absence of stress - ability to manage those things that cause stress and to "recover".
"I can 'get away' without following that element..." Famous last words...leading one off the path to happiness onto the path for unhappiness. Each one of these are necessary, not optional!
For instance, Barbara insisted that it was not important to "say the right words", even being irritated at the request as if it were a request for perfection that she would soon fail at. So she didn't practice and try to get better at it. She treated it as if it was not something to gain from but something to potentially fail at or as something that was a hassle or hard to do. She did not realize the incredible value of being "impeccable with your word', which is one of the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz (Comments on His Philosophy Of Life, on this site.) So she kept repeating over and over her "stories", further grooving into her neuronal pathways the negative beliefs/thoughts.