This relates, naturally, to the Problem Solving and Decision Making processes, so you should visit the main page of that section.
KEEPING THE PROBLEM
Basically, there are several reasons we don't change:
1. We become oblivious to the harm or loss of potential benefits.
Of course, the solution is to set aside time to focus on this in a systematic
way, most often with assistance.
2. We buy into the myths and excuses behind not changing.
See the article on that: (to be inserted).
3. We don't know how to proceed or even how to specify what is needed.
Clarifying the latter is the purpose of this section.
SOLVING THE PROBLEM
Do these in this order. Become an expert in solving problems, for you will then not have persistent problems - it'll make a huge difference in your life! Spend a few hours getting the basis down!
I. Logically, then, in order to create change, we need to do the opposite of the above ("doing the opposite of what is not working" is generally a very good strategy in life!!!). This process is explained and shown in action in The Five Stages Of Deliberate Change.
Within that piece, you'll benefit from using these two forms:
1. My Master List Of What Is Harming Me Or Not Serving My Life - This is a list of the things you want to change and a way of prioritizing them. Use this!
It is a form of housecleaning that will have a tremendous effect on your life, as you will have identified what will make a difference and then start to work on it sooner in life, rather than letting those negatives persist!
2. Processing For Deliberate Change - A simple form for making each change,
including the reasons and the action steps, along with a commitment process and a follow-up process.
II. Peruse the many relevant pieces in the Problem-Solving/Decision-Making section and read the overview. Please don't stop at perusing the forms below, as those are just some of the forms and pieces that are in that section:
process.
problem at a higher level, such that you are more able to achieve your desired outcome. Each
piece is necessary - you can't skip these steps and get to the solution, though many try
(unsuccessfully) to do do. You identify the problem and the impact on you and restate your
intention. You then choose a new way of being, and from that new way of being, you pick the
actions needed. I'll guarantee you'll get further with this approach than one without addressing
and then choosing the way of being. The sheet is only one page!
traditional format that has all the steps. It also includes an alternate form for a more thorough
approach where it is warranted. If the problem has any importance to you, you'll use this
practical form to assure a solution.
factors and steps necessary to make the right decisions.
we've got to deconstruct and reconstruct to solve the problem. Separating out what actually
happened and identifying what you said to yourself are integral to the process. Identifying the
consequences (and then the worst and best that could happen) helps "concretize" what one is
dealing with. Then you question and/or dispute the thinking and the assumptions behind the
thinking and the believed consequences and then come up with a new answer and a (incredibly
valuable) new perspective. It works.
the problem, whereas it is actually the cause that is the source of the problem. (Of course,
the symptom is undesired.) This is a commitment form, where you commit to following a
"right thinking" mode rather than keepin' on keepin' on with erroneous beliefs that create the
problem in the first place!!!!
