A few quick points first:
VITAL, VITAL, VITAL - One of the three most important influences of
HIGH RISK: "...Marriage carries a great risk. In our society, at least
three out of four end in disappointment - either in unhappiness or
divorce." (By one knowledgeable estimate: 93%!)
DOING IT "RIGHT" IS A KEY SKILL AND GOAL - Thus it is suggested you seriously consider making this happen the right way!
IF SINGLE: The single best way to assure that your marriage will succeed is to
build, hone and perfect your mate selection skills." And don't forget to learn about
relationships and the necessary skills, as they help you be more able to select well.
Select rightly or suffer (and it's hard to do it without a cooperative, willing
the right way and save alot of effort and add alot of happiness to your life -
IF MARRIED: But if you're already married, then the best way is to thoroughly
ground and train yourself in the skills of marriage.
WORTH LEARNING?: "If I asked you to fly a plane..., I'm sure you would reach out for expert guidance." And you'd learn as soon as possible and as completely as you could, instead of letting it 'just happen'. But a marriage relationship is far more complex and far more important. Doesn't it deserve your very, very, very best efforts?
The problem is that there is no immediate perceived threat (as contrasted with crashing in an airplane), so couples wait until they hit bottom to learn these. It is far wiser to follow the truth in "a stitch in time saves nine [later]" - potentially saving the whole ballgame!
Direct quotes are from Neil Clark Warren from his excellent CD set "Finding The Love Of Your Life", eHarmony.com. If you are seeking the right mate, this is "must" listening.