We need a full set of empowering, useful "scripts" with which to guide our lives and our self talk.
"What!!!", you say. "That's too much work!! And it's ridiculous to have scripts!"
Well, I hope you realize that you've already spent a lot of time and effort into creating scripts for all of your life so far - except some of the scripts are of "inferior" quality, to say the least.
Just like the "cool kids" in school, you need to spend time creating "cool" conversations that work to get you what you want - except most of the scripts we are concerned with are the internal ones, where we need to revise the ones that make no sense. Part of what underlies those scripts are beliefs, so we need to replace some of them, so that we can "speak" the truth to ourselves.
Don't stop until you've created a full set of scripts for your life, as the quality of your life will depend greatly on how good your scripts are!
Creating an empowering conversation, internally and/or externally, to replace the current internal conversation will lighten up your life and dramatically increase the level of your happiness.
Set about, now, to start create the main scripts for "coping", "empowering", and affirming - and then have great conversations with yourself with zero criticisms or negatives!
Have a great time with this, as you will create great results from this work!
(Consider setting up a self-talk book to create with and to refer to, like or intermixed with, The Beliefs Notebook.)
CONTENTS OF THIS PAGE:
The "self-conversation" determines the quality of our lives
What we speak to others is part of the conversation
Part of a bigger process
Stopping the "other" conversations
Will you commit to shifting "roles" and to "the process"?
Eliminating the negative
Creating the positive basics
THE "SELF-CONVERSATION" DETERMINES THE QUALITY OF OUR LIVES
What we say to ourselves determines the quality of our lives, yet we leave it up to random inputs and unthought-out conclusions.
If we instead create "on purpose" a more powerful way of thinking, we can create a life where we no longer limit ourselves and where we create what we want, freely and with great strength and effectiveness.
At the base of our conversations are beliefs. Beliefs are determinate of how we feel about life. False beliefs are the source of fear and negative emotion, unnecessarily, yet we persist in them.
We cannot live a good life with those, so they must be replaced with empowering, true beliefs that serve us.
But if we do not "install" them properly, we lose much of the power.
And if we don't create a general self conversation that consists of highly empowering statements, declarations, affirmations, commitments and stands, we are leaving alot of the potential of life on the table. We can, instead, reap the full value of life and of feeling good and powerful on a consistent basis.
Will you join me in creating that?
Unconsciously, we "affirm" beliefs and "facts" constantly. Yet we affirm what isn't true. We repeat what we have acquired from others and from easily accessible sources.
Affirmations are underrated, misused, and used in a limited manner. When they are used they are often structured ineffectively with the wrong message or a light weight one, with minimal benefit.
They should be considered to be an invaluable, essential part of creating a much more powerful new way of thinking and speaking. Not only do they help create more of a balance toward the positive, but they also help create a personal powerfulness and a strong certainty of self, both of which are great traits that underly the success in life of the happiest people on earth.
WHAT WE SPEAK TO OTHERS IS PART OF THIS CONVERSATION
One should be aware that whatever one speaks to another will be heard by one's brain and recorded anew.
It is also vital that one learn what Powerful Languaging is and to avoid using its opposite.
PART OF A BIGGER PROCESS
These affirmations/statements are is a part of a bigger process, which is that of replacing beliefs that are erroneous but which one has thoroughly bought into and grown to believe as "the truth", even though they often make no real sense if they are looked at at all. The affirmations and statements below reflect possible replacements that you can look at and see if they might be useful and then just use them.
STOPPING THE "OTHER" CONVERSATION
As you know, it is depressing and harmful to have negative thoughts, especially when they are chained together into a downward spiral. Those should not be tolerated in your mental/emotional house. If you haven't learned this skill, read
In some cases, it is better for you to go through and look at your beliefs in a more detailed way and then deconstruct and reconstruct new true, useful ones.
See the Beliefs/Thoughts section as to how to create the new beliefs AND the understanding necessary to buy into them.
The affirmation process is a way of learning the new beliefs and imprinting them through the "greatest learning device": repetition. We learned the dysfunctional ones by repetition and we can override them by repetition. We've simply got to affirm over and over what is a true belief that is helpful and useful for creating a better way of thinking and a better life.
This might seem like a lot of work to some, and it does take some initial extra time and focus, but soon the new conversations will become automatic and effortless - and your self conversatons become seemingly magically positive, while actually being very soundly grounded. The process actually changes the neuronal pathways, so it becomes "hard wired" into your thinking and "permanent" (until replaced), in a scientifically proven process of Rewiring The Brain.
Now, if we look at the purpose of affirmations, it becomes obvious that they are other supporting actions that help contribute to achieve that same purpose. The purpose is to realize our full power (and be happy) - or, on the other side, to STOP being unpowerful or holding ourselves back or down.
WILL YOU COMMIT TO SHIFTING "ROLES" AND TO "THE PROCESS"?
In the piece called Creating Empowering Self-Conversations, we discuss the idea of creating a substitute for the Critic/Judge role that creates most of the negative conversations and you have the opportunity to check off what you've been doing and what you will commit to in this process. You'll find that when you are taking on a role (intending to put yourself into that role) your conversation will change automatically to what is more consistent with that role. That is why I encourage you to try to shift from the Child role (and conversation, which is weak and powerless and damaging) to the Rational, Nurturing Adult role (which is forward looking, responsible, and powerful). "The Process" consists of going from identifying the negative thoughts, through the Changing Beliefs Process, and finally to the installing through review and repetition until they are part of your internal conversation. You must commit to the whole process to get the best payoff for your efforts.
ELIMINATING THE NEGATIVE
CREATING THE POSITIVE BASICS
In The Affirmations/Empowerment Practices , one creates a "supply" of position changing and empowering conversations and affirmations and focuses on key affirmations. Gratitude affirmations and creating a "ground of being" are a part of the process.
See the section of Psychology entitled "Internal Conversations" as this is integral with affirmations, which are another form of internal conversation. Find out the why and what by reading the Overview discussion or, if you prefer go to the individual sections, listed below, and explore. Glance at the different types of affirmations, statements, and declarations that can be used to create a conversation that is very certain and very powerful.
TABLE OF CONTENTS - Navigate to what is of interest to you. (See also Internal Conversations in Overall Psychology - for how to alter them and alter your life.) You can read these individually below or you can scan to see what is there and then go to the Reading Program, where it suggests a reading order. THE CONVERSATIONS (All "conversations" are based on Beliefs, so see that section
AFFIRMATIONS OVERALL -
AFFIRMATIONS SPECIFIC AREAS
SITUATIONAL AFFIRMING/COPING CONVERSATIONS
Mantras - Repeat over and over to become centered, peaceful, powerful or
whatever one desires as a way of being or thinking.
Comforting statements - Talking to yourself as a loving parent would comfort a
child. Have 1, 3, or 5 strong ones.
offsetting stress, offsetting suffering, and/or addressing fears. See list
of items might comfort self for in the Mantras section..
or the importance and puts it into perspective more.
Taking A Stand
to make "clear disclaimers of what is absolutely untrue!"
part of freeing yourself up from useless old beliefs. These are
examples of what you should disclaim - see if you agree.
Of Who I Am
in life and the way I will leave
See also and know the basics of
Sentence - Processing Into Empowering Statements
Reworking Core Statements
Stupid (and other) Tapes - Dealing with them
OTHER RELATED SECTIONS
great confidence based on a very well-grounded approach
Anxiety, Fear - Reducing it to virtually nothing.
Mood management - Being able to pull out of or put yourself into a particular
Stress (Also see Physical) - You should have an active but relatively stress-free
Suffering and struggle - Stop creating unnecessary suffering and making life
THE READING PROGRAM
DISEMPOWERING! This is a potent central concept and exercise to engage
them, for greater happiness and centeredness.
part of the underlying viewpoints that will help you design your affirmations.
THEN CONSIDER IMPLEMENTING THIS STRATEGY
AFFIRMATIONS TO CHOOSE OR CREATE FROM
learn the vital skill of no-blame, no criticism, and great confidence
based on a very well-grounded approach
Key Affirmations - It is necessary to focus on a few to memorize completely and
run your life by.
at when you need to be centered. Place these in your Reminders
Notebook (see Lifebooks/Notebooks).
combination, with several types of affirmations (of intention, rules,
being, etc.) of a relatively enlightened person.
Coping Type Thoughts - Psychologically Essential
Per researcher Donal Meichenaum (1977) we can inoculate ourselves
against fear with surprisingly simple coping thoughts. This is simply
replacing danger thoughts with more realistic, "true" thinking. These
are thoughts that generalize about life which are brought into mind
readily and frequently whenever "stuff" happens or is anticipated to
statements are provided to choose from or jump off of.
- Develop repeated sayings that are not the normal negatives
coming from your mind but which settle you or empower you
you may not have enough time to deal with it or replace it - that's
when it is important to have a coping statement that you believe
that can minimize it - such as "It's no big deal" or "I'll be fine" or
whatever fits for you. You should have a few of these memorized
and ready for instant use. (The fear thought should never be
allowed to continue and imprint itself even more powerfully.)
Centering, Positioning Statements
is, how he can live his life, and what he is "about" in life. Empowering.
You might want to create one for yourself and insert it in your Reminders
Power Statements - See, for further illumination, Power In Life (in Life
My Power Life Statement
spontaneous writing, where an individual is getting a perspective on a difficult
situation and reaffirming himself to have more power to handle the situation for
TAKING A STAND
One of the things that make a difference in people's lives is writing up and
strongly standing behind a clear statement of what the standards are that they
will maintain for their lives and each part of their lives.
and being clearer on what I put into my mind. I was given an opportunity to
write for 90 minutes in a workshop. These are excerpts from that writing,
ones that I try to read daily. This kind of exercise can have a huge impact
on one's life.
THIS IS NOT TRUE
useless old beliefs sometimes requires forceful negation of the negative,
whereas positive affirmations may not be adequate (or complete).
part of freeing yourself up from useless old beliefs. These are examples
of what you should disclaim - see if you agree. A start on a compilation of
what I declare is not true (and no longer true), to help clarify and make one
more certain. Such as "I am no longer a child", which seems obvious but
which might have to be stated. "..not true..need other's approval..."
The Key to A Happier Life
No matter how powerful or self-developed, almost all individuals are running their lives based on some dressed-up versions of childhood decisions, from which they created the beliefs, viewpoints and "rules" that run their lives.
Why haven't they completely "re-formed" them when this is such a vitally productive thing to do? Because of lack of time and/or lack of awareness of an efficient, effective process for completing rational, well-thought-out, empowering revisions and/or replacements.
Through this no-cost website, one can select an individual piece to enhance life and/or can fully participate in the process of "completing' what is needed to have a virtually fearless, centered, peace of mind, effective, happy life beyond any ever before visualized.